…big mindset shifts to become your most attractive self. Stop trading short term gratification for long term happiness We’ve all become accustomed to instant gratification. So it’s only natural that you might seek out those same dopamine hits with women. You want to regularly feel that women like you and desire you. You feel happy when they do. You sit around at home eagerly waiting for texts. When you do go out to social events, you are solely foc…

…ment, or rejection. What you don’t realize is that you’re trading in short-term comfort for long-term misery. It’s hard to comprehend, but believe me, the hidden cost of listening to your fears is more significant than you could ever imagine. Mo fears mo problems When you avoid doing things that scare you, it has a snowball effect on your life. Let me paint you a bleak picture… Maybe most of the girls you’ve dated have been through school or frien…

…table and making your future self deal with more hardship. Trading in long-term happiness for short-term happiness is never a viable solution. Humans thrive because we evolve. Life is a never-ending journey where you have to adapt to create lasting happiness. I don’t care if you’re 21 or 41 — you need to accept that the time to change is now. So…how do you finally change? Once you’ve accepted that you can change and that you want to change, you ne…

…. Ask yourself… “Did those things making me more or less happy in the long-term?” “Was I settling for short-term comfort at the expense of my long-term happiness?” “Was I compromising out of fear or to seek approval?” I know it can be hard to generate ideas so let me help you out. Examples of what to cut out Stop letting your parents influence your dating life. When you talk to your parents, do they always bring up the fact that you’re still singl…

…ta, you just have to explore all possibilities and then whittle them down. Search for credible sources and validate data as best as you can. When taking in lots of data, focus on sources that have been known to do their due diligence or speak the truth. That includes people as well. Search for sources that prioritize the truth over sensationalism. Don’t seek out people who speak in hyperbole just to excite others. Prioritize publications that have…

…e experiences. And that’s when they grow long-term, not from getting short-term interest from a random woman. Back to the Irish pub. Julian and I chatted with a middle-aged woman that grew up in the most poverty-stricken parts of Dublin for almost two hours. She told us about her tricks of the street life, how the nuns were borderline abusive in schools, how the priests used drugs and hit on women, and how she narrowly escaped running away from ho…

…ung men with little romantic experience and older men coming out of a long-term relationship. (I know a lot of married men use this as well but I’m going to focus on single guys since that’s who I work with.) So what’s the catch? Well…there’s a significant hidden cost. And it usually comes in the form of your self-worth and long-term happiness. This isn’t me preaching some moral high ground. I’m all for legalized, safe regulation of the world’s ol…

…atch: when you do this, you’re NOT positioning yourself as a genuine, long-term romantic partner. For a woman to seriously consider you, she first has to become emotionally attracted to YOU. She should want to connect with you for your personality. She should desire your confidence, character, kindness, and sexuality. She must value you as a potential lover first and foremost. Then you can eventually be a provider as well. When you’re trying to im…

…ink long-term. For example: You want to say hello to a stranger. The short-term answer to the question could be, “I want to run and go home because I’m terrified.” The real, long-term answer would be, “I want to be able to walk up to a new girl and have fun talking to her.” Now take that goal and instead of focusing on the end result, treat it as an experiment. Ask yourself… Regardless of what happens, what can I learn from this? You’ll get more e…

…ds to prove his worth by showing his money or status early on. Always has “strings attached” or motives for being generous or doing favors. Expects something in return and gets angry or guilt trips when it doesn’t happen – exhibits manipulative behavior. Judges people based on external factors such as appearance or material items. Sees women primarily as sexual objects. His main goal is to have sex with them and does not care or actually listen. D…